Light and Dark or Dark
by LSMerlot
Summary: T for violence and language. Raven loses control to her demon side during a battle, and there are problems that she doesn't want to acknowledge.
1. Chapter 1

Okay, I'm tired of staring at this. Given my very limited knowledge of Teen Titans, my writing skills, etc., I think this is sadly the best it's going to be.

I do not own Teen Titans or anything associated with it.

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**Light and Dark … or Dark**

Raven hit the warehouse wall hard and grunted as she slid down to the floor.

"Ha! Is that all you got?" Jinx taunted.

Raven growled, and her eyes opened with a furious white glow. She was trying very hard to keep her emotions under control, but it could be so difficult during battle. It didn't help that Jinx had such a grating and taunting personality.

Jinx threw an indifferent glance over her shoulder to the raucous fight behind her before snidely commenting, "Too bad your team's getting their butts kicked. Looks like you could use a little help."

"I don't need help!" Raven snapped back, and several crates in the near vicinity suddenly exploded in starbursts of splinters.

"Ooh, tou-_chy_," Jinx taunted, foolishly unfazed.

Raven gritted her teeth and threw her clawed hands forwards, a telltale black glow surrounding them and shooting out towards Jinx. The nimble villain easily dodged and frustratingly continued to hop around through flips and cartwheels to dodge all of the other black-glowing projectiles that Raven sent her way.

Raven jumped to her feet and pressed forward, continuing to harry Jinx with whatever debris Raven could find to throw, but Jinx kept dodging or using her own powers to deflect the projectiles. The whole time Jinx kept that insufferable smirk on her face while Raven's teeth clenched harder and harder together in growing rage.

"Can't you do _any_thing?" Jinx remarked between flips.

A ferocious snarl escaped Raven.

_KILL!_

Raven abruptly stopped where she was hovering a few feet above the ground and shut down, staring blankly into the distance as she drifted back to the floor and tried to control her emotions. That thought, that nearly overwhelming need for violence, it had been her demon half coming forward with more strength than she wanted it to have, and only the surprise of its abruptness had allowed her to stop it in its tracks like she had done. She could still feel it, though, clawing in the back of her mind to be let loose to wreak utter destruction. Her anger was giving her demonic side too much power.

A large violet heel came out of nowhere as Jinx's platform shoe slammed into Raven's face. A moment of empty, black vision clouded Raven's mind, and she felt herself fall to the floor on her side with an _oomf_. Her vision quickly cleared, but it felt like the bone structure of her left eye and cheek had caved in, and she raised a hand to her face as if to check that it was all still whole.

"You're pathetic," Jinx said as she stood over Raven with her pallid hand on her hip and a haughty look on her face. "I could have taken you down with my eyes closed."

"I was trying not to hurt you!" Raven snapped back, her anger returning almost full force. There was something about being hit in the face that was an automatic piss-off, and her demon raged in her mind again to be let free.

Jinx propped both hands on her hips to support her hearty laughter at that one, and she leaned down to taunt, "_You_ hurt _me_? Not even in your dreams…or nightmares. Whatever it is someone like you has."

Raven growled and threw out a glowing hand, but Jinx caught Raven's wrist before Raven could do anything.

"Face it, princess, you're nothing without your team to help you," Jinx said.

_Snap!_

Raven growled with inhuman ferocity, and the surge of power that burst forth at her will was enough to simultaneously lift Raven to her feet and to blow Jinx back into a nearby tower of crates. Four lurid eyes watched the villain crash through the boxes, but before Jinx's momentum could end and leave her somewhere in the middle of the pyramid, Raven rushed forward with demonic speed to snatch the still flying Jinx in the merciless grasp of a claw. Holding Jinx by the neck, Raven changed the villain's direction and slammed Jinx down with such force that Jinx crashed through the boxes beneath and still had enough momentum to slam into the concrete floor and crack it. Gravity was catching up enough to try to collapse the pile of crates on top of the two pale creatures trapped within, but the aura of power surrounding Raven was enough that the debris crashed around her and not on her as she hovered. She watched the wooden pieces and random broken items fall to bury Jinx before Jinx even had the chance to open her eyes, but it wasn't enough for Raven. Her fangs clenched together, and Raven's entire body tensed with pent up violence as she imagined her preferred image of seeing herself shred Jinx into bloody pieces of chunky flesh, stringy ligaments, and hard bone.

A snarled scream—or maybe an animalistic roar roughly escaped Raven's throat, and she shot down through the debris like it wasn't even there until she once again held Jinx in her claws. The villain's eyes were still closed, and Raven stared down with dissatisfaction as her power burst forth again. Somewhere in her mind she was aware that she had blown the whole pyramid of crates into smithereens that shot out in all directions, but her full attention was on her prey, waiting for Jinx to open her eyes and become aware of what was about to happen to her. Raven's demon wanted to see the suffering, wanted to relish the agony.

"Raven, no!" came a cry from the side.

Though the male voice was familiar, it did nothing to distract Raven, and her claws sank deeper into Jinx's shoulders.

Something slammed into Raven's side. She was deep enough into her transformation that she hardly felt any pain, but the force was enough to throw her rolling across the floor. She quickly came out of her roll on hands and knees and snapped into a ready crouch, a growl ripping across her lips as her four eyes stared down the masked intruder. With one knee up and the other leg stretched out to the side, he had one hand planted on the ground in front of him while the other held a steel staff behind his back. Even with his eyes hidden, Raven could see that his face was grim and determined.

More importantly, he was thus defensively posed in front of her prey.

_Get out of my way!_ Raven wanted to command, but it only came out as another ferocious growl.

"Raven, don't. This isn't you," he said in slightly softer tones.

Her growling fell away at the gentle, familiar voice. This male wasn't just some obstacle; he was Robin.

Robin…

Memories flowed through Raven's mind, and as they did, the demon lost its dominance there. She slowly calmed, her body relaxing, her claws turning back into delicate hands. She blinked, and her eyes returned to normal. Raven slowly straightened, and she fought down the vestiges of her demon side. The after effect was kind of like crashing after an adrenaline rush, and she suddenly felt weak and lightheaded, though she did well to remain standing there as if nothing were wrong.

Robin slowly stood and held his staff in a more relaxed grip at his side, but he didn't move towards Raven or say anything more to her. She could only stand there and return his stare while she silently tried to recuperate.

"Dude, Raven, what _happened_?" came a raspy voice.

The new voice snapped Raven out of her stare, and she looked to the side to see Beast Boy scratching the back of his head as he looked over the incapacitated and bloody Jinx. Movement made Raven aware of others as more heroes and villains joined the destructive scene. The fighting had apparently stopped, and both sides stood in shock around the epicenter of Raven's explosive rage.

Raven's eyes scanned the onlookers. Her friends were able to meet her gaze, but no one else could. Mammoth, Billy Numerous, and even Kyd Wykkyd all looked away. Raven's eyes lingered on Gizmo simply because he was the last one they fell on, and the expression of fear that shot over his small face would have been comical in a different situation. He quickly lifted his hands in front of him and waved them back and forth as his jetpack pulled him farther from Raven.

"Uh, we give up!" Gizmo cried out in his squeaky voice.

Raven had not realized how empty the demon's parting influence had left her until Gizmo's reaction caused her to feel a spark of some emotion where she otherwise would not. In fact, she was now aware that she was trying to feel several emotions, but she wasn't sure what they were. It was like hiding different objects beneath a thick quilt then trying to identify what they were by running her hands over them: She could feel that they were there, knew the general shape of them, but couldn't quite identify each one. Was that shame? Guilt? Anxiety? Fear?

Even her numb versions of emotions were too much, and Raven closed her eyes and turned her face away. She had not meant to give in to her emotions and her demon heritage; it had just happened.

A gentle but firm hand on her shoulder elicited her to open her eyes and look into Robin's mask. His expression appeared stoic, but she could feel the concern rolling off of him.

"Maybe you should head back, and we'll finish up here," Robin gently offered.

Raven only nodded, agreeing that she should leave as soon as possible, and a circle of the floor turned liquid black beneath her as she sank into it. She saw once again the concerned expressions of all her friends before she slipped completely through, and those dull emotions she almost felt before turned more piercing as they came on more strongly.

After traveling through the ether and phasing back into her dark room, Raven walked to the middle of her floor and immediately hovered up into the lotus position for meditation. She was trying very hard not to think about what she had done or even what she had _almost_ done. It had been a long time since she had lost control like that, and the power and virulence of the outburst were enough to upset her.

And the graphic violence…

The lingering emotions from the ordeal were gaining too much strength, and books and other various objects around her room were trembling or idly flying about at the mercy of her tumultuous powers.

"Azarath Metrion Zinthos. Azarath Metrion Zinthos. Azarath Metrion Zinthos," Raven chanted with a furrowed brow.

_You're nothing without your team to help you_, Jinx's words echoed in Raven's head.

"Azarath Metrion _Zinthos_."

A surge of anger directed at Jinx but also at herself caused the last word to come out more forcefully, and a book promptly exploded in a littering of pages. Raven gritted her teeth, and one of her eyebrows twitched with the effort of calming down, but she was probably as much of an emotional wreck at the moment as her tranquil nature could be. This wasn't going to be easy, and frankly, she could use a little help. These emotions were not merely going to lie back and do as she said.

With that thought, Raven telekinetically turned on her modest stereo, and since her iPod was already wired to it, she easily sifted through the songs in her mind before making the iPod play the first one that she thought of to help her calm down.

The song started off with slow but heavy guitar, and for awhile she thought it would be too slow. Raven was looking for something to help her calm down, yes, but the song kind of needed to meet her halfway to get there. The guitar picked up a little, but it still wasn't enough. She tried to listen patiently as the singer's lorn voice finally joined the thick guitar, but just as she was considering switching to another song, the chorus hit.

As the melody and the words filled the darkness, wove into it, and surrounded her, she knew this song was the correct choice after all. Her emotions smoothed out beneath the soothing song, and her spirit took on a lighter quality. She even found the objects around the room to be flowing and bobbing along to the music instead of flying erratically about.

Too soon the chorus evened out again into the heavy melody from before, but this time it was no task at all to wait through it. Raven didn't bob her head to the beat, but her aura fluctuated in unison with it like the ocean answering the call of the moon. Then the chorus returned, and she was somehow both settled and invigorated by the music. It gave her what she needed, so this time she was ready for it when the chorus faded out again.

_Music __**does**__ soothe the soul_, Raven thought to herself when the guitar solo took off, and not only her aura, but the whole ambiance of the room seemed to flow with the music. It was perfect.

The song eventually returned again to the constant, uncomplicated guitar riffs, and their simplicity and uniformity seemed to add to her growing stability. Raven breathed in the slow words when the singer joined the guitar again, and when she breathed out, it was like serenity settled upon her to stay. The books and other items gently settled back into their places.

This time when the chorus hit, she paid closer attention to the lyrics and relished every one. Darkness was beautiful to her, and so these words held their own allure. A sort of smirk that was almost a smile graced her lips, for she would even dare to say that the morbid poeticism described her.

Light and dark.

After all, Raven was of Arella and Trigon, of Azarath and demon blood, and if that wasn't both celestial and hellish, then she didn't know what was.

The song ended and took with it a sigh from Raven. Her existence was basically a paradox, built on both light and darkness. She could be both or neither, all at exactly the same time, and it didn't take a genius to see that such a way of life could become very, very complicated and strenuous. As much as she hated her father, Trigon, and didn't want to be like him, she had to admit that her life would have been a lot easier if she had simply been one side or the other, even if that meant she had to be completely dark.

Dark or light. A citizen of Azarath or a demon child. Why did she have to be both? Sometimes it damn near rendered her apart.

Raven sighed again and prepared to meditate now that silence filled the room. It did no good to question one's existence like this since there was no such thing as throwing back a life and demanding a new one.

_Azarath Metrion Zinthos. Azarath Metrion Zinthos. Aza—light and dark_. Raven's eyes popped open as she thought about it. _Light and dark. Light and... Light __**or**__ dark_.

That half-smile-mostly-smirk returned to her face, and she closed her eyes.

Light _or_ dark. What an amusing thought.

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AN: Okay, so it has the potential to have more chapters added, but I don't know if it's worth it. I don't know if I made the characters too--what is that term? OOC?--so I don't know if I'm just ruining it.

Also, I at least know that the series never had a music theme tied to Raven, but I kind of thought it should have. _Music does soothe the soul_, right? And sorry if that part was a little boring, but I was trying to follow the guidelines of the site (no lyrics) while still being descriptive enough to give the feel of the song for Raven. If you're curious about what song it was, I don't think there are rules agains titles and artists, so: "Of Stars and Smoke" by Candlemass. If you've never heard the song before, please make it to the chorus before deciding if it's too slow. : )

Anyways, I hope I didn't mess up any of the musical terms on top of all of that. I did actually have piano lessons for six years, but despite my teachers' best efforts, I stubbornly refused to learn any theory. : )


	2. Chapter 2

I'm sorry, but this is going to be a long author's note at the beginning. There are some explanations and apologies that I need to get out of the way.

I actually sacrificed the money to purchase the complete set of the Teen Titans television series. In watching all of the episodes, however, there seemed to me to be some differences between the animated series and the comics. I know almost nothing about the comics (all that I know I gathered from extra research and from other people), and since I went through all of the trouble to buy and to watch the television series, I would like to base my writing off of the show. In other words, I'm going to piss some of you off because there are some characteristics about comic-version Raven and other characters that I am not going to include. However, I do like some of the ideas of the comic version that never made it to the show, so I'm going to piss others of you off by cherry-picking what I will and will not include about the comics version. Please people, I am sorry. This is just the way it's going to be, and since I've explained it and apologized, any flames regarding the matter will be ignored.

However, that is not to say that I would not appreciate hearing the readers' ideas as long as all of you are willing to present them in a reasonable manner and not bursting with the fires of Hell. : ) So don't be discouraged about leaving a review; just make sure that you try to respect me as much as I am trying to respect you. : )

Okay, enough of the drama. : ) The last bit that I'm going to say is that I'm assuming some familiarity with the show. Spoiler alerts should be understood without mentioning, and I'm not going to include detailed flashbacks unless all of you think that I'm losing the reader too much.

I do not own Teen Titans or anything associated with it.

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**Personal Demons**

A knock sounded on Raven's door, and she could sense that it was Robin standing outside.

How predictable.

Then again, she had to admit that she shouldn't be so judgmental. Robin was probably the only one of her friends that was brave enough and understanding enough to face her right now after what they had all seen her do in the last fight a couple of hours ago. Beast Boy was definitely too chicken—no pun intended—in the face of Raven's wrath, and Starfire was too innocent and cheery to handle one of Raven's dark moods. Cyborg might have stood a chance, but he would know that Robin understood Raven better, so the machine-man would concede the one-on-one to Robin.

_Oh great. A one-on-one_, Raven thought, paying attention to her own musings. Still, her friends would need to know that she was all right, so she would have to endure this. At least she had been able to meditate enough to find her emotionless equilibrium again.

Delicately falling out of her meditative hover, she lightly touched her feet to the ground and pulled her hood up. It was comforting to hide in the hanging shadows of the garment, though thankfully she didn't have anything to hide physically. Jinx had landed a hard kick to Raven's face during the fight, but not the slightest darkening of Raven's pale skin gave evidence to that strike. The magic she used to reinforce her flesh during battle had done much to detract from the severity of the hit, and her demonic transformation and massive power output had augmented her natural healing so that there was now no physical reminder of what had happened.

Raven reluctantly walked to the door and opened it, and sure enough, Robin stood patiently on the other side.

"I'm fine, Robin," Raven immediately said. She didn't want to talk about this, so the sooner she could get rid of him, the better.

One of his mask-eyes arched when he raised an eyebrow, and he just stared at her.

Even though Robin was still standing outside of her room, she still felt his presence keenly and wanted all the more for him to go away. _No one_ entered her room, but on top of that, she didn't even much care for people looking in. It felt invasive to her, almost as invasive as if someone were to initiate a psychic link to her mind without her consent. Raven's room was her shelter, her only place to be who she was without inhibition and to surround herself with what she liked. It was her little sanctuary, and she didn't like anyone diminishing its sacredness by looking in and making judgments.

"Are you sure you're fine?" Robin finally spoke. "I've never seen you lose control like that."

"It won't happen again."

"I'm not your leader right now. I'm here as your friend. Talk to me, Raven. What happened?"

Raven patiently blinked and monotonously replied, "Robin, you have seen me lose control before. Remember Dr. Light? I fixed that problem then; I will fix this problem now. I'm fine."

"If it already happened again, then maybe you haven't fixed it."

Raven stared a moment. Was he judging her? Robin was just standing there, staring back, and though she could still sense the concern flowing out of him, this gave her no indication of what he was thinking. Raven wasn't about to jump inside his head, either. Reading auras was one thing, and reading minds was something completely other.

"They are different problems," Raven asserted. "When I lost control with Dr. Light, it was a problem with my father."

"Then what's the problem now?" Robin genuinely asked.

Raven turned her face aside. She wasn't quite sure.

"You really hurt Jinx. Bad," Robin said when she didn't answer. "We had to take her to the emergency room in the penitentiary's hospital immediately after the fight."

Raven just stared at the doorframe. That was definitely shame and guilt trying to get her attention, but there was a bit of humiliation there, too. Jinx was a bitch in Raven's opinion, especially after having rejoined the villains despite the honorary title of Titan that had been bestowed on her, but that didn't mean that Jinx deserved what Raven had done to her—never mind even considering the whole heroes-don't-do-that thing that Raven had violated. She needed to make things right, but Robin wasn't the one she needed to make things right with. It was Jinx who would not realize that Raven had not meant to cause that kind of harm, Jinx whom Raven had hurt, and so it was Jinx to whom Raven needed to make her amends. If Raven thought about it, the thing that was really bothering her right now with Robin was that he had seen her lose control. It was humiliating to her, and she also didn't want him to start questioning her abilities or to look at her differently.

"I know you didn't mean to do it," Robin said, stepping closer and holding a hand up and out to his side. "Let us help you, Raven. Whatever you're going through now, let us help you through it."

"So that I don't accidentally put one of _you_ in the hospital?" she replied with a hint of acerbity.

The hand that Robin was holding up, he gently placed on Raven's shoulder. She moved her eyes to look at him but didn't turn her face.

"It's not about that," he said confidently but softly. "We know that you wouldn't hurt one of us. Raven, you've been willing to _sacrifice_ yourself for us in the past." His hand squeezed her shoulder. "We really are concerned about you. All of us."

Raven turned her head to fully stare at Robin, but he was being sincere. Against all reason, his words were the truth.

"Thank you," she replied, and he smiled in response and thankfully let go of her shoulder.

"So what's on your mind?" Robin asked in friendly tones.

Raven shook her head. "I lost my temper while I was fighting Jinx," she forced herself to admit.

Again Robin arched a mask-eye as he raised an eyebrow at that. He was probably wondering how the stoic Raven had managed to lose her temper, but he didn't ask the obvious question. That was just as well because she didn't have an obvious answer. Some explanation was still required, though, so she tried to give him what explanation she could.

"It happens. There will always be a part of me that feels. I can try to ignore it; I can suppress it, try to control it, but I can't extinguish it. I've tried. And negative emotions are stronger than positive emotions. Anger is especially difficult to control."

"Maybe it's good that you can't extinguish your emotions."

It was Raven's turn to raise an eyebrow.

"Emotions are part of being human. Maybe you shouldn't want to get rid of them completely," Robin explained.

"Maybe I can't afford to be as human as everybody else."

Robin seemed concerned again, and he argued, "You have a right to live. Part of living is feeling."

"But I don't have that luxury."

Robin was clearly struggling to say something else to that, but what could he say? He knew as well as everyone else on the team that emotions affected Raven's powers, and Raven was powerful enough that such a game was too dangerous to play. The truth was simple, and as is the normal nature of truth, it was ugly.

"Don't worry about it, Robin," Raven said, switching their roles around. "I don't mind the sacrifice to keep everyone else safe."

"But that's just it," he insisted. "You're always sacrificing."

Raven shrugged. "So is everyone else. Everyone sacrifices something for other people. My sacrifice is just…different."

She could tell that Robin was reluctant to accept that answer, but again, it was just the truth. It took him awhile to finally accede and nod.

"So you're sure there's nothing on your mind?" Robin gently pressed.

"Why do you keep asking?"

"It's just that I've never seen you like you were today. Even if you sometimes lose your temper, you never react like _that_."

"Everyone has a bad day. This one was mine. I'll make sure that it doesn't happen again."

Robin evenly regarded her, probably weighing her words, but he eventually accepted her excuse with a nod. That didn't mean he believed that the problem was so easily summed up, but at least he wasn't going to push it.

"Just be sure to talk to us if something is bothering you," he said.

Raven merely nodded, a response that could be confused between acknowledgment and agreement, but she was purposely making her answer as nebulous as she could while still giving enough to satisfy Robin. If she ever needed to talk to someone about her problems, it would be him, and he had to know that. Nonetheless, she knew herself well enough to know that it would probably turn out to be a lie if she promised that she would talk to anyone about what bothered her. She had kept things to herself in the past, and that quality wasn't likely to change much.

Robin apparently accepted her nod, for he smiled again before he turned and left. Just before walking out of earshot, however, he jokingly commented, "I don't think Beast Boy will be pestering you for a while. Enjoy the peace while you can."

When her door closed, though, it left Raven staring at the floor. Robin's parting remark was meant to lighten the mood, but it had the opposite effect. How confident _were_ her friends that she wouldn't hurt them? How confident was _she_ that she wouldn't hurt them? Maybe it wasn't confidence, but temerity. Raven was still dangerous. Everyone should know that, especially after today. How sure could anyone be that she wouldn't one day lose control enough to really hurt someone close to her?

_No, I wouldn't hurt any of them. I __**wouldn't**_, Raven firmly thought. Robin was right: She would sooner sacrifice herself than harm her friends.

_But that doesn't mean that I wouldn't hurt __**someone**_.

Raven sighed and massaged her temples. Control, control, control. She was good at it; she prided herself in it; and she wasn't about to start losing it now. She was a good guy, one of the heroes, and heroes didn't hurt other people just because of personal demons.

Even if that personal demon were half of their heritage.

Raven frowned, and not wanting to think about that, she instead turned her thoughts toward Jinx. Raven was not one to give a meaningless apology, but she had definitely wronged Jinx, so something needed to be done. The stubborn villain probably wouldn't want to accept any form of amendments, but this was also for Raven's peace of mind. Emotions were annoying enough without having some base for existence.

"Remove the source, remove the effect," Raven said to herself.

She lingered in her room a moment, considering whether or not to tell anyone she was going out, but she decided to keep the visit as discreet as possible. She especially didn't want word about this spreading to people outside of the Titan circle because the last thing Raven wanted was for the whole world to know. This was more personal, and the world had no respect for confidentiality and leaving people unto their own.

Raven called to her powers and transformed into her soul self, seeping out of the physical realm to travel through the ether. She wasn't very familiar with the location of the infirmary in the prison, so it took her longer to get there than if she had been seeking a place she frequently or normally visited. Nonetheless, she sensed it out easily enough in the physical realm and startled a receptionist by phasing up through the floor right in front of the counter. The ruby-lipped blonde behind the counter shrieked and pulled away with her hands coming up to her chest defensively, but at least she had the sense not to start screaming.

"There's a criminal here, Jinx. I want to see her," Raven succinctly said, cutting straight to the point.

"Wh-who are you?" the receptionist stuttered.

_Probably tonight's nightmare in your sleep_, Raven thought, considering that it might have been a better idea to phase through the floor outside and enter through the door like a normal person.

"I am Raven of the Titans," she answered aloud.

"Oh!" the receptionist exclaimed in recognition. She dropped her hands and finally began to calm down, even taking a deep breath to steady herself. "Well, I know you're one of the heroes and all, but I'm not supposed to..."

The receptionist's voice withered beneath the heat of Raven's scowl, and the blonde gave a nervous smile instead and snatched up the phone with a flick of her wrist.

"I'll call my supervisor and see what I can do," the receptionist offered in an appeasing tone. "Can you tell me the nature of your visit?"

Raven was reluctant to answer the question, but she also knew that she was more likely to be denied if she didn't have a good reason to see Jinx.

"You are aware that the criminal was badly hurt?" Raven asked. When the blonde nodded, Raven continued, "It was an accident and not the Titans way of doing things. I am here to make amends."

A forthcoming question was written all over the receptionist's perplexed features, but Raven was not in the mood for telling her whole life story to some nosy woman.

"I'm in a bit of a hurry," Raven peremptorily said.

"Oh," the receptionist awkwardly replied, fluttering her free hand like she didn't know what to do with it. Eventually she settled for repeatedly jabbing her finger into the phone to dial the appropriate number, and Raven was impressed that the ruby-lipped woman's equally ruby fingernails didn't pierce right through the suddenly delicate-looking technology.

Not wanting to make the receptionist any more nervous than she already was, Raven kindly walked away to the empty sitting area so that the woman could make the call without the pressure of someone watching. Raven didn't bother with sitting down (she was either going to get clearance to see Jinx, or she was not), so she stood with her arms crossed and facing the lone TV hanging in the corner of the room. The news was on, as was apparently customary for TVs in any waiting location, but the news was nothing exciting. The normal pessimism and depressing stories streamed across the screen with the vapid voices of the reporters to add to the dreariness.

_Even with all we do, all the crime we fight, the wrong that we try to eradicate, they will always find something else wrong with the world and choose only to see that_, Raven thought. _People think I'm dark, but at least I don't go __**looking**__ for things to be depressed about._

"Um, Ms. Raven?" the receptionist called.

She turned to regard the blonde, and the blonde shrank back again for no apparent reason. Raven was on the opposite side of the room, for crying out loud, and she was a _hero_ on top of that. What exactly was the receptionist intimidated by? Well, it didn't matter. Intimidation made people leave Raven alone, so Raven wasn't about to rue something that provided some good, even if it were an effortless and inexplicable thing.

"You have been granted permission to see the criminal Jinx, but you will have to be escorted to the room," the receptionist explained, twisting her hands around the phone she held almost protectively against her shoulder. "The medical staff just left her a few minutes ago, so they shouldn't be interrupting you, unless you plan to stay for a while. They will need to check on her in a couple of hours or so. And um, she's probably resting. You know: Head injuries can make people want to sleep," she finished with an apologetic wince.

Raven nodded, not at all caring that Jinx might not be awake, and the blonde relayed the acceptance to her supervisor. A few minutes and awkward silence later—awkward for the receptionist, anyway—the promised escort arrived. The two guards were grim and merely nodded to Raven in greeting, and she returned the reticent gesture and followed their lead through the halls.

The infirmary wasn't a large section of the penitentiary, but it was well kept. Even criminals deserved good medical care, and it didn't bother Raven to see the high-tech equipment in some of the rooms that the group passed. As long as the law-abiding citizens received the highest standards first, then she didn't really care that criminals received excellent medical treatment as well. There was a difference between punishment and cruelty, and it was her opinion that unattended, dismal health afflictions tended to fall under cruelty.

The guards stopped at a door, and one produced a key card to gain access to the room. When the door opened with a green light and a soft beep, it looked like the guards were going to follow Raven in, so she hesitated.

"May I see her alone?" Raven asked.

The guards exchanged a glance, but only one of them spoke up.

"That is inadvisable," he said. "Her powers have been suppressed, but Jinx is still a dangerous criminal."

Clearly the guards didn't share the same fear of Raven that the receptionist did. It didn't really irritate Raven, but it was nonetheless hindering her from getting into the room alone, so she allowed her eyes to glow softly with the promise of more hidden power.

"I brought her down," Raven said evenly. "I know what Jinx is capable of, and _I_ am more than capable of handling that."

The guards exchanged another look, and the silent one shrugged.

"We'll have to lock you in the room, and we'll be standing outside for the entirety of your visit. If we hear anything suspicious, we will enter the room immediately," said the spokesman of the two in a solid business-like tone.

"Agreed, but please do not interrupt otherwise."

The guards nodded, and they let her walk alone into the room. The door closed behind her, and a buzz and red light above the doorframe notified that it was locked. The room wasn't very large, just large enough for two maybe three personnel to scoot around if they all had to be present at the same time. There were thin floor-to-ceiling cupboards built into the walls on either side of the door, a bed with leather restraints in the middle of the opposite wall, and medical equipment to either side. Only one chair had been placed next to the bed.

Jinx was lying asleep and securely strapped onto the hospital bed with various instruments connected to her by wires and an over-bleached bed sheet tucking her in. Whatever was suppressing her powers, it had to be something connected to her but out of sight, perhaps a special manacle of some sort. Raven's own powers were left unaffected.

To the side, Raven spotted a quick-reference file clamped to a clipboard on one of the small steel tables, so she picked it up to look over it. Medical jargon aside, what she could gather from summing up the report was that Jinx had suffered a severe concussion, internal bleeding, several broken bones, and a good medley of bruises, scratches, scrapes, and punctures from claws and debris.

_I did all of that?_ Raven thought unhappily as she stood there. She glanced up and looked at Jinx again. The myriad injuries must be most evident beneath the bed sheet, but Jinx's face was kind of bruised, scratched, and scraped as it was.

She placed the clipboard back on the table and telekinetically pulled over the chair for her to sit in beside the bed. Raven was going to heal Jinx, and that would require a lot of power and a lot of energy that didn't need to be wasted even on something as simple as hovering.

"Azarath Metrion Zinthos," Raven quietly chanted, calling her powers to herself, and she held her hands over Jinx to begin the mending.

Healing was an arduous and delicate art that required a lot of patience, energy, and concentration, so it didn't help that Raven's guess about the hidden manacle proved to be correct. There wasn't just a single manacle, either, but one on each of Jinx's wrists. Their fluctuating energies disrupted a controlled use of magic, so being in direct contact with Jinx, the manacles would prevent her from summoning the magic necessary to use her powers. Raven was far enough out of the influence of the manacles that she was still capable of summoning her own powers, but that didn't mean that she wouldn't have to work around the disruptive energies. Consequently, that meant that Raven would have to exercise more force and control than usual to work around the manacles' influence and to keep her healing magic focused on its task in the physical realm.

The situation couldn't be helped, so Raven didn't bother stalling over it. Her hands glowed blue as the healing magic answered her will, and she worked to keep it controlled in spite of the disruptive energies that were present. The extra effort wasn't particularly strenuous at first, but the more Raven healed, the more she strained to keep going, and the longer she took, the more she had to chant her mantra under her breath. Her mantra served as a sort of focus, a way to rein in the magic to specifically following Raven's will and not its own, so the wearier she became with her efforts, the more she needed that focus and containment.

By the end of an hour, Raven was chanting the words as a constant litany, but she was still using too much power and consequently too much energy. Finally, she simply sagged against the back of the chair and released a sigh. She was exhausted, and her energy for magic was mostly used up, leaving her with an uncomfortably empty feeling. However, her efforts were not in vain. Jinx would be much better now, and her body would be more than capable of healing the rest of the injuries on its own. There shouldn't even be any obvious scarring.

Then the pain hit, and Raven clenched her teeth and sat up straight, tensing all over. It was Jinx's pain—or it would have been Jinx's pain had she been awake to feel it—but now it was Raven's pain.

"Azarath Metrion Zinthos," she began chanting again, but this time the purpose was different. Before, she had been controlling her magic. Now, she was controlling her mind and body, trying to reach that meditative equilibrium that would help her ignore the pain. It was difficult since the pain had set in before the trance, but Raven was determined to be the master of her physical being, so she folded her legs up in the chair and concentrated.

"Azarath Metrion Zinthos. Azarath Metrion Zinthos." _Azarath Metrion Zinthos. Azarath Metrion Zinthos._

The mantra served its purpose to focus her thoughts, and slowly she gained the upper hand. It was much the same as fighting down emotions: All of it was still there, but Raven was pushing it farther and farther away from her consciousness until it was just a dull nuisance in the background of her mind.

Finally she was in control. It had been a difficult fight, but now that she had reached the relaxed trance she had been seeking, it would be much easier to stay there. Even so, Raven couldn't be sure how long the stolen pain would last, and she would have to maintain her meditation for the entire duration. Slip once, and the hurt would come back full force. Pain was persistent and pernicious that way.

That didn't mean that she couldn't think about other things, though, as long as she did it carefully, and so her mind wandered. She was rather surprised that the guards hadn't become suspicious and burst in on her anyway despite her request. Perhaps they had merely looked through the grated window in the door and decided that whatever was going on was nothing to worry about, and if that were the case, then it was relief that they had made such a judgment. Truly, it could have been disastrous if they had interrupted Raven's concentration, especially when she had been trying to quell the aftershock of pain.

That made her think about how pissed Robin would be if he knew how far Raven had just pushed herself. On one hand she appreciated that someone would show concern for her, but on the other hand, sometimes he could be overbearing. He seemed to get the idea every now and then that he knew her better than she did. Raven knew her weaknesses and her strengths; she knew what she could do, and what she could not. She didn't need Robin governing her actions.

Of course, she couldn't really hold this small flaw against him. Robin was just trying to be a good leader, and she was certainly not singled out in his sometimes forceful concern. It was his job to make sure that each member of his team was all right, not just for that teammate's sake, but for the good of the whole team as well. Besides, he was also being a good friend, if a little bit of a persistent good friend.

"What are you doing?" Jinx suddenly asked, her tired voice curious but still holding some sass.

"Not now," Raven somehow managed to answer in an even tone. She had nearly snapped out of her meditation at Jinx's interruption, and the ever-waiting pain was quick to surge forward again.

Thankfully Jinx shut up for once, though it was indeterminable whether that was because of a new respect for Raven or some other reason.

_Azarath Metrion Zinthos. Azarath Metrion Zinthos_, Raven mentally chanted, focusing her mind. She quickly reached that place of indifference again, and she relaxed as the pain throbbed in her body at a much more tolerable level of intensity.

Jinx was surprisingly patient, and again, Raven couldn't tell why exactly that might be. Raven was grateful for the silence nonetheless, and when enough time passed that the pain finally subsided, she opened her eyes and steadily regarded Jinx. The villain returned her regard.

"Feeling better?" Raven monotonously asked, but despite her tone of voice, she meant the question.

"…Yeah," Jinx hesitantly answered. "You did that, didn't you?"

Raven didn't answer, just dropped her hands from the meditative position to rest them comfortably on her knees.

"Um, thanks," Jinx said unsurely.

Raven shook her head. "I didn't mean to hurt you like that."

Jinx quickly looked away and tried not to shiver, but this time there was no guilt trying to work its way into Raven's psyche. What was done was done, and she had made her amends. If Jinx still reacted to the hero with fear, then it was as it was. There was no reason for Raven to be burdened by it.

With that thought, Raven unfolded her legs to prepare to leave, but she didn't immediately stand as she felt the prickly pain from the return of blood flow.

"Hey, you're pretty scary, you know that?" Jinx commented.

Raven raised her eyes to see Jinx looking at her, but the comment was neither insulting nor complimenting, at least not to Raven since she had long gotten over being different like that.

"I never realized you had that other side to you," Jinx softly added, perhaps unsure if she might be treading on dangerous ground.

"I try not to show it," Raven answered.

"I don't know. You're pretty kick ass when you let it out."

Raven flicked up an eyebrow. Jinx didn't know what she was talking about, but that didn't stop Raven from being amused that the villain was speaking like this.

"I don't like to lose, but I'm not stupid either," Jinx said. "If you were like that all the time, we'd never stand a chance."

"Why are you telling me this?"

Jinx shrugged one shoulder, pulling at the restraints that held her down. "I guess I was wrong about you being nothing without your team."

Raven closed her eyes. "I am everything because of my team, because of my friends. Without them…"

She didn't finish the sentence as she thought about what Starfire had foretold of the future in the Warp incident. What a dismal way everyone had ended up in that future, but Raven had been particularly shocked at herself. She had known her friends were important to her, but she had also always thought she was more stable than to fall apart if left alone. Starfire's retelling had shaken Raven at the time, had made Raven realize that her friends really were all she had that kept her from sinking into an engulfing abyss.

But that was then with the variables and constants of that time. Enough of that future had not been lived out that it was likely a null future now. Raven had lived through more experiences since that battle with Warp, and she found herself doubting once again that she would fall apart in the absence of her friends. They were still important to her, no argument there, but she was steadier and wiser now than she had been back when Starfire had traveled time.

"Hey, you zoning out again?" Jinx asked.

Raven opened her eyes, gave a simple "No," and stood to leave. She had made it to the door and had her hand poised to knock when Jinx threw out a last comment.

"You didn't have to heal me, you know."

Raven paused and answered, "It was my damage to mend."

Jinx snickered, and a smirk was evident in her voice as she replied, "So we're not buddy buddies or anything now, right?"

"No."

"Good. 'Cause I'm kickin' your ass next time."

Raven just shook her head. Jinx was irrepressible.

That did, however, remind Raven of _one_ thing that she wanted to ask before leaving. It was a matter that smacked of betrayal to her, though it was certainly nothing as personal or keen as Terra's betrayal had been.

"Jinx."

"Yeah?"

"Why did you rejoin the H.I.V.E. Five? Why didn't you stay on our side, after we made you an honorary Titan?"

Only silence followed, so Raven turned to regard the villain. Raw pain twisted Jinx's features before she quickly covered it with a derogatory smirk.

"Maybe I was always meant to be bad," Jinx tried to flippantly reply. Her voice wasn't natural, though, but held a foreign timbre that again showed her pain.

"What happened?" Raven asked, her curiosity getting the better of her.

"That's none of your business!" Jinx snapped back. "What do _you_ care anyway?"

Raven stood there for awhile, but Jinx was right. The villain's business was her own, and Raven had no right to pressure the girl to talk about this. Besides, Jinx clearly didn't want anyone else to know what had happened, and Jinx was stubborn enough that she was capable of taking that secret to her grave if she wanted.

"It was only a question," Raven answered before knocking on the door.

The knock was quickly answered by the soft beep and green light. Raven opened the door and stepped out, but if the guards were suspicious about what Raven had been doing in there that whole time, they said nothing. In fact, no one said anything as the door was shut and locked again, and Raven was led back out the way they had brought her in. She would mention to the receptionist that someone should be sent to check on Jinx's improved condition.

The earlier part of the conversation with Jinx had given Raven something to think about, though, and she considered what had been implied. The only villains that she knew really took her seriously now were Dr. Light and Jinx, and both of them had seen her bad side. Everyone else just seemed to see her as the quiet Titan of the bunch and gave her less heed.

_I wonder how my team sees me._

Raven quickly shook that thought from her head. Of course she was an integral part of the team! The five of them lived and trained together, and they functioned as a whole. If any one of them were missing, no matter who it might be, they were incomplete. She shouldn't question that.

_Besides, they're my friends. Each of us builds up the others._

Raven massaged her temples. She didn't doubt her friends, and she decided instead that the thoughts had been caused by her exhaustion. As soon as she got back to her room, she was going to rest and try to sleep a little. The amount of power she had expended really took it out of her. The oh-so-amazing Boy Wonder might be able to function on such little rest, but Raven didn't like to push herself in the same way. After all, a weary mind was a weak mind; a weak mind lacked control; and she would not have that.

* * *

AN: There you go. I know it was kind of boring, but I thought it was a necessary evil to get some explanations out of the way (like theories that I'm using on the way Raven's magic works etc.) and to start setting things up for the central plot. If any of you have any questions, please direct them to someone who knows the answers. : D Okay, seriously though, I'll respond if you ask me something, unless you're asking for spoilers to this story. : ) I hope I didn't piss any of you off too much or even disappoint you for that matter. I don't like conflict, and I would like to try to give the readers what they want, but I'm only human. : )

By the way, if any of you freaked out over the fact that Jinx was sleeping after having suffered a concussion, I'm pretty sure that's a wive's tale about slipping into a coma. I've had a concussion myself and known other people who have likewise been to the emergency room for the same, and none of us were told by the doctors not to sleep. In fact, the doctors recommended rest. So yeah, I'm not a medical student, but from what I know, you're not guaranteed to slip into a coma if you fall asleep after a concussion.


	3. Chapter 3

OOC-ness alert. I'm sorry guys, but it's true. There's probably also some chronological errors, but I did my best to figure out a timeline. I always give my best in everything that I do, but right now, this is my best. Definitely this chapter isn't even as edited as I'd like it to be, but if I don't upload it now, I'm not sure I ever will. Life discovered my hiding spot and is making up for lost time. : ) I'm going through a really hard time right now, so much so that I'm not even sure I'll make it back from this one—not in a deadly sort of way, but I've just sort of lost all artistic will in everything.

Anyways, I also apologize to any Spanish speakers because it's been a _long_ time since I've been around the language, so I've pretty much lost any ability I ever had to speak it.

I do not own: Teen Titans, Puff the Magic Dragon, Reign of Fire, or Godzilla. Oh yes, aren't you just ever so curious now to know what in the world is going on this chapter? ; )

* * *

**Past Histories**

Robin stood in front of one wall of the evidence room, scowling at the pictures and articles tacked across its face. He hated this wall. It consumed so much of his time but never repaid him with any answers. Worse still, every time he thought he was done with it, he would find himself standing there yet again. He didn't even bother with adding a chair for comfort, preferring to stand as firm and stolid as the unyielding obstacle.

In the very center of the collage, the mask taunted him. Half-black and half-coppery tan, it stared back at him through one empty eye, and its grated mouth withheld its secrets with silence for words.

Robin narrowed his eyes and glared fiercely. After all this time, Slade, Robin's nemesis, remained a thorn in the Boy Wonder's side. It just didn't seem physically possible for one villain to so haunt a hero, but Slade was making it his existential expertise.

_It's like his only purpose is to cause conflict for __**me**_, Robin thought to himself, scowling all the harder.

It had been more than a year since the defeat of Trigon before Slade had made another appearance, and even then it had only been an empty robot that Beast Boy had fought at the old fair. That was the last that the Titans had overtly heard from Slade, but Robin had long suspected over the next year and several months that Slade was still behind many unsolved mysteries. The villain was always one answer out of reach, one mastermind higher in the criminal food chain, one glimpse of a shadow that could never be confirmed. Even so, as intangible as he could make himself, he still managed to have a strong presence in Robin's life.

And now Slade might be preparing to make his presence known again. _Again_. There were just too many pawns that Robin had been running across lately in the recent crime spike, too many criminals that were too dense to have organized for themselves the heists they were pulling, but not a single one that Robin had apprehended could tell him who was feeding them these ideas or why. It made him grind his teeth to be so positive that he knew who was behind this yet to have no proof. As long as he didn't have proof, the others would think he was just obsessing again.

Robin's stomach growled, and his scowl turned into an annoyed frown. He had been ignoring his hunger for almost two hours now, but he was only human, and he would have to satisfy his physical needs.

_It's not like it won't still be here when I get back_, he thought to himself as he gave the mask a parting glare.

Robin left the evidence room and began walking the halls toward the common room, and his feet carried him unerringly while his eyes saw not the interior of the Titans Tower, but the wall of questions that he had left behind. Slade was too damn crafty not to have some method to his madness, but Robin was failing to find the connections he was looking for amid the recent crimes. Hell, Robin was failing to find without doubt that it was even Slade who was doing all of this. He just _knew_. It was a gut feeling that shouted in Robin's head, telling him his old nemesis was back to being up to no good.

The smell of food greeted Robin before the doors to the common room even came into view, and his mouth watered as he hoped that he hadn't already missed the opportunity to get some of whatever had been cooked. It was well past the normal lunch hour, but with Cyborg and Beast Boy around, every hour between 10:00 am and 5:00 pm was an opportunity for a lunch hour, so it was still possible that Robin had arrived in time to bum off some food.

Robin walked into the common room and immediately looked towards the kitchen, and in good fortune, Cyborg was just pulling something out of the oven. It looked like lasagna and smelled absolutely delicious.

"Hey, Robin! Just in time!" Cyborg called out excitedly and beamed over his steaming dish as he set it down on the counter.

"Hey, Cyborg," Robin greeted more sedately. He sat down in the chair directly in front of the lasagna. "So what's in it?" he asked with a smile, knowing that Cyborg would be all too happy to describe his culinary creation.

"Only like every meat known to man!" Beast Boy cut in, popping up out of nowhere and looking in horror at the lasagna. "Maybe _even_ man!" He gave a woozy sigh, swayed, and fell backwards in a theatrical faint.

Starfire gasped as she flew over and joined them. "Please, you eat other humans on your planet?" she asked. "That is unthinkable!"

"Don't worry, Star," Cyborg assured. "BB's just bein' overdramatic. There ain't nothin' in here ta be worried about. It's just good ol' home cookin' with pork, beef, chicken, turkey, and none of that spinach stuff."

"Isn't having chicken _and_ turkey redundant?" Raven drily commented from across the room. She had remained seated in her chair, still reading a novel while everyone else had congregated in the kitchen. She looked completely relaxed, though, with her hood down and legs comfortably crossed.

"Not in my book!" Cyborg defended. "Now who wants some?"

Beast Boy had just pulled himself back to his feet, but he exaggerated fainting again when Cyborg cut out a huge chunk of the lasagna and plopped it down on a plate, meat and cheese oozing out from between the thin layers of pasta.

"I'll take some," Robin spoke up, earning himself the first plate.

"I also shall try the pork, beef, chicken, and turkey with none of 'the spinach,' " Starfire said.

Cyborg slid a plateful to Starfire and called out to Raven, "How 'bout you, Raven? C'mon, you know you want some."

Raven patiently lifted her eyes from the page she was reading and answered, "I just ate an hour ago."

"So?"

"I'm not hungry."

"C'mon, girl. You need ta put some meat on them bones."

"No."

Raven ended the debate by returning to her book, and Cyborg left her alone.

Robin prodded at the lasagna with his fork, waiting for it to cool down a little, but Starfire had no such qualms and dug in. Her face immediately lit up with delight, and Robin smiled to see her so pleased. It always made him happy to see her happy.

"So whatcha think?" Cyborg asked the alien girl, though he already wore a smug smile as he casually leaned on one elbow on the counter.

"It is delicious!" Starfire exclaimed. "Please, what is the name of this Earth dish?"

"It's lasagna like you've never seen before. I like ta call it 'Cyborg's new four meat and cheese lasagna.' "

"More like 'Cyborg's four murders and a theft lasagna, ' " Beast Boy grumbled, standing up and crossing his arms in a pout.

Robin smiled and turned his attention back to his food as Cyborg and Beast Boy jumped into a continuation of their lifelong contention between being carnivorous versus being vegetarian. It was an argument that never really ended, just took breaks between meals. He sliced into his own lasagna, having no inhibitions himself against the main ingredients, but the fork never made it to his mouth as the main computer began beeping in announcement of an incoming transmission. Lunch would just have to wait a little longer.

"Cyborg, put it up on the screen," Robin said, getting up and walking into the living area to be in direct sight of whoever was calling.

The giant flatscreen suddenly filled with the face and shoulders of an exhausted Bumblebee, who was covered in soot. One of her hair buns even looked singed and disfigured. The sight captured the attention of everyone in the common room, and those who were still in the kitchen wandered over to the living area to get a better look.

"Whoa," Beast Boy breathed out as he took in the sight of the Titans East leader.

"Bumblebee, are you all right?" Robin immediately asked, and he planted his hands on the console to peer closely at the screen, trying to see behind her for some indication of what was going on. All he could make out, though, was that she was back in the Titans East Tower.

"Sorta. We got our butts kicked, but we're all still in one piece," Bumblebee tiredly answered.

"Speak for yourself," Aqualad dismally remarked from somewhere off-screen.

"¡El lagarto gigante! ¡El lagarto gigante! ¡Ya no queremos combatir el lagarto gigante!" two high-pitched voices whined together. ["The giant lizard! The giant lizard! We don't want to fight the giant lizard anymore!"]

Bumblebee gritted her teeth and leaned away to yell, "Aqualad! Calm 'em down! I'm tryin' to talk to Robin!" She turned back to Robin, who was still trying and failing to see what was going on. "Sorry about that. I guess the twins have a fear of dragons."

"Dragons?" Robin repeated, his eyes widening in surprise.

"No way!" Beast Boy cut in. "You mean like _Puff the Magic Dragon_ kind of dragons or like _Reign of Fire_ kind of dragons?" he asked, morphing appropriately for illustrations.

"Well, not drag-_uns_, but drag-_un_," Bumblebee answered. "And I mean the dragon-we-fought-against-in-the-Brotherhood-of-Evil-showdown kind of dragon."

"But I thought the Herald sent it to another dimension," Cyborg put in.

"Then I guess it got out," Bumblebee impatiently replied and pointedly jabbed a finger at her ruined hair bun. Her weariness returned, though, and she tiredly asked, "You guys fought this thing before, right? Got any pointers?"

Everyone in the Titans West living room immediately turned towards Raven. She was sitting on the edge of her seat, and her teeth were gritted as she stared up at the screen, her book lying forgotten in her lap. It took her a moment to realize that everyone was looking at her, but when she did, she quickly cleared the expression from her face and lifted her hood over her head.

"Are you absolutely sure it's the same dragon?" Raven evenly asked.

"Yeah, we're sure. We've had plenty of opportunities to look at it." Bumblebee winced and admitted, "This isn't the first time we've fought it and lost."

"You didn't have to tell them _that_," came Speedy's quiet grumble as he trudged across the background of the screen. It was difficult to see behind Bumblebee, but there was an unmistakable frown on his face as he held up a hand mirror and tried to comb his frizzed hair back into perfection.

Bumblebee ignored him and added, "We thought we got it one time. Aqualad had soaked the thing with so much water that it could barely puff out a wisp of smoke. Me and Speedy went in to finish it off—" a look off irritation crossed her face, and she looked to the side to interject, "because Mas and Menos were too busy cowering somewhere."

"No nos ocultábamos, mujer mandón," one of the off-screen twins retorted. "Proporcionábamos refuerzo." ["We weren't hiding, bossy woman. We were providing backup."]

Bumblebee crinkled one side of her nose but didn't start an argument with them. Instead she relaxed and turned back to the screen.

"But after we blasted it, it just disappeared," she said. "We thought that was the end until it came back today."

"He just disappeared?" Raven repeated dubiously. "Malchior can't just disappear and reappear."

"Are you sure?" Robin asked. "Since the Brotherhood of Evil got their hands on the book, can we be sure of anything when it comes to Malchior?"

Raven slid a glance at Robin, and though he couldn't see any indicative expressions beneath her hood, he got the feeling like he had just insulted or offended her in some way. He hadn't meant to question her judgment; he was just being thorough. Or maybe she was upset because he had brought up the fact that someone had secretly stolen the book from her in the first place; in which case, he wasn't blaming her. Whoever had stolen the book had replaced it with a very convincing replica, and since the Titans had been traveling so much that year anyway, it wasn't surprising that something had managed to get stolen without anyone noticing. Besides, Robin had a theory on who could have pulled off a theft like that, and if the particular criminal in mind had managed to steal the Red X suit from the vault, then it was hardly a wonder that the same criminal could switch out Raven's book with a fake without her noticing it.

Or perhaps Robin was reading way too much into her reaction, and she was merely displeased by the idea that Malchior might have some new tricks up his sleeves. He wouldn't know unless she spoke up about it, which she wouldn't.

"Has he always appeared as a dragon?" Raven asked Bumblebee.

"Why wouldn't he?" Bumblebee quizzically replied.

The question went unanswered as Raven looked down at the floor to think. Whatever thought crossed her mind, it didn't look good judging from the way her fists clenched.

"The Malchior has disguised himself in humanoid form in the past," Starfire supplied since no one else answered.

"But if he isn't appearing in a human form anymore, then he might be fully released from the book this time," Raven quietly added, raising her head again.

"Is that possible?" Robin asked.

"I did it before, didn't I?" Raven unhappily pointed out, flicking her eyes to his face.

"Yeah, but you know all that creepy magic stuff," Beast Boy said, waving his hands at his sides. His blithe comment was clear evidence that he was oblivious to the tone lacing Raven's voice. "Who else could've done it?"

"BB's got a point," Cyborg said.

"Malchior taught me how to do it. He could have taught someone else," Raven said.

There was still a tinge of displeasure in her voice, and Robin thought it might be a warning sign. He didn't want Beast Boy or anyone else pushing her too far, especially with the incident from a couple of weeks ago that had landed Jinx in the emergency room. Raven had said that it was an accident and nothing more, that she was fine, and he wanted to trust her judgment, but he also knew that sometimes she could convince herself and others she was fine when she wasn't. A certain scary-movie night stood as a particular reminder of that.

"Bumblebee, can we get back to you on this?" Robin said to the screen.

"Sure thing. It's not like we're going anywhere for a while," she replied, unhappily wiping some soot from her cheek.

"Titans out."

He ended the transmission and turned back to his team. Beast Boy had one hand on his hip and the other scratching his head as he squinted at the ceiling for answers, and Cyborg and Starfire were both looking to Robin for his leadership. Raven, he noticed, was looking away again.

Damn. Robin wanted to help out the Titans East, but this couldn't have come at a worse time. He was so sure that Slade was back, and he couldn't risk leaving Jump City for a day lest the villain take full advantage of such an absence. It put Robin in a bad spot, torn between his personal vendetta and the other group of Titans. He didn't have time for this, and he certainly couldn't leave.

_Maybe I don't have to_, Robin thought, turning his head toward Raven.

"I got it!" Beast Boy said with a snap. "When the Herald sent Malchior to another dimension, the radiation turned him into a super dragon just like that iguana in that movie got turned into Godzilla. Then Malchior laid a trillion super-dragon eggs that started falling through wormholes, and one fell in Steel City, probably into a factory where the heat incubated it until it hatched into a dimension-traveling alien dragon!" he ended in a shout, pulling at his hair in histrionic anxiety.

"Malchior is male," Raven deadpanned, cluing Beast Boy into the most obvious oversight.

"Oh right," the changeling demurely replied, touching his finger to his chin to reconsider his theory.

Cyborg started laughing outright.

"Please, the Zilla is a deity on your planet?" Starfire asked.

Cyborg's laughter cut off as his jaw dropped at Starfire's confusion, and Beast Boy looked like he was also about to freak out over the alien girl not knowing who Godzilla was.

Robin decided to take the opportunity for a semi-private conversation with Raven. He quietly walked over to her while the other three Titans began discussing Godzilla in the background, and Raven placed her book aside and stood at his approach.

"Raven, you're the only one who really knows Malchior's weaknesses and how to defeat him," Robin said, carefully choosing his words.

"I know, but without the book…" She looked away, though he wasn't sure if this were a reaction of a lack of confidence or of further thought.

"Magic is your expertise. If anyone is going to find a way to lock Malchior away again, it's going to be you."

Raven returned her gaze to his face but didn't respond to that.

Robin hesitated for only a fraction of a moment before he carefully asked, "Would you be willing to go to Steel City to help the other Titans?"

"You mean _alone_," Raven stated rather than asked.

He shook his head. "You won't be alone. You'll have Bumblebee and the rest of Titans East with you, and if you need _us_, all you'll have to do is call. Promise."

Robin smiled and added, "Besides, maybe a little time spent with the Titans East could do you some good. You might be able to make new—"

He was about to say "friends," but the way Raven was glaring at him, daring him to finish that, made him stop short, and it very nearly had him taking a step back. Maybe he should just let that one go.

Raven briefly glanced down in a moment of consideration, but it wasn't long before she looked back up and nodded.

"Only if you mean it. I'm not forcing you to do this," Robin said.

They both knew why he was emphasizing free will, and he could tell that if he hadn't irritated Raven before, then he had definitely done so now.

"Robin, you know me. I'm not concerned about what happened before; I'm only worried about what Malchior's return could mean. Emotions do not and will not affect my judgment."

"I know," he said softly. He wanted to add something else to that, but he couldn't, not without Raven taking offense to it. He wanted to say that he wasn't concerned about her abilities or the decisions she would make, but he was concerned about _her_. Just because she could function as if she had no history with Malchior didn't mean that it wouldn't hurt her on some level to do so.

"Are you sure you know? Maybe you don't," Raven said. "I don't hold anything against him anymore, Robin. This mission means nothing more or less to me than if you were sending me after any other enemy. What happened, happened. There is no reason for it to negatively affect what happens next."

Robin was half stunned and half dubious. Raven would never intentionally lie, of that he was sure, but did she know herself so well that she could tell him this so confidently? She had always been unique and irreplaceable in her ability to be so levelheaded and place logic over emotion, but she was human. As Robin had told her a couple of weeks ago, feeling was part of being human. Could she really have so completely let go of what happened between her and Malchior?

Robin's surprise fell away, and he considered instead that perhaps he had overestimated Malchior's effect on Raven and had underestimated her ability to accept the things that are and move on. He supposed that it was a good quality for her to have, but he still rued the fact that Raven ever had to learn this absolute control of her psyche in the first place. He saw it as constraining or at least onerous for her.

Although, perhaps that was Robin's biased opinion. Raven didn't seem to mind this intense control of herself and had even said so. Perhaps he was seeing captivity and burden where there was none. If this was the way she had to live and she had no problem with that, then what right did _he_ have to question it?

"You know I trust you," Robin said with a smile. "I didn't mean to question you."

"It was understandable."

Raven turned away and headed for the doors, and he decided not to press the issue. If she said she'd do it, she would, and if she said she was fine…well, he'd have to trust her. Even if Raven didn't always talk to someone else about her problems, that didn't mean she wasn't fully capable of taking care of herself. Robin just wished she _would_ allow her friends to help her more. It seemed like she always tried to carry every burden alone, but there were people all around her who cared about her and would willingly share the weight of her troubles.

Raven walked out of the common room and out of sight, and Robin turned to see the other three Titans still avidly discussing Godzilla. Beast Boy had morphed himself into a hardly intimidating representation of the classic monster, and Cyborg was didactically pointing out the various qualities while Starfire observed and nodded seriously in rapt attention.

Deciding not to interrupt the lesson, Robin went straight to the console and reopened a communication line to the Titans East Tower. Bumblebee promptly appeared on the screen, her face now clean of soot, though her hair bun was still pining for better days.

"So, you got a solution?" Bumblebee tiredly asked, skipping pleasantries altogether.

Robin shook his head and grimly replied, "I can't help you, but I can send someone who can."

"Raven?" Bumblebee easily guessed. It would have been difficult for her not to notice how everyone had looked to the pale Titan when the subject of the dragon had been brought up.

Robin nodded. "She said she'd go."

"In that case, maybe we can make a trade. Mind if Mas and Menos stay with you guys for a while? They don't seem too keen on the dragon thing, and if they're not going to be useful here, I'd rather they be useful _somewhere_."

Robin deliberated, though he tried to be quick about it so that Bumblebee wouldn't notice and get the wrong impression. He didn't have anything against Mas and Menos—hell, they had proved crucial in the final fight with the Brotherhood of Evil—but he was reluctant to take on members from another team when he was sure it was Slade he would soon be up against. It was too difficult to fight a powerful opponent with a team that wasn't fully adjusted to each other. He was already hard pressed to lose a critical teammate by letting Raven go for a while, but she really was the best-suited one to take down Malchior—maybe even the _only_ one who could.

Robin's ever-processing mind, however, skipped ahead of him and was already thinking about how he could use Mas and Menos on his team. It could prove useful to come at Slade with a pair of heroes that the villain had not fought before, and different tactical maneuvers already began formulating in Robin's head. He still hoped he would have Raven back before any official confrontations with his nemesis, but if he had to, then he would use Mas and Menos to the best advantage he could.

"Agreed," Robin said, to which Bumblebee gave a sigh of relief. "We'll arrange the details later. For now, you and your team should recuperate."

"Sure thing. Over and out."

The screen went blank, and Robin dropped his head to stare at the console. He was sure he was making the right decision here, but something about it suddenly bothered him nonetheless. Maybe he _shouldn't_ be sending Raven alone to do this. She was fully capable of a solo mission, and it wasn't like this technically was a solo mission since the Titans East were going to be there, but this was _Malchior_ after all. Robin couldn't know exactly what Raven had gone through with the betrayal or if she had completely gotten over it. She acted indifferent and said it meant nothing, but that was Raven being Raven. When had she ever been completely forthcoming, even with herself, about something that bothered her?

His brow furrowed. No, this had to be the right decision. Not only did Robin have to stay in Jump City to capture Slade, but Raven had said she would take care of Malchior, and he shouldn't doubt her.

He looked over his shoulder and saw that Starfire's lesson was over, and the other three Titans were staring back at him.

"Dude! You're going to send Raven out there alone?" Beast Boy incredulously asked, waving his hands wildly. "Hel-_lo_! Don't you remember last time? Malchior totally tricked her!"

Robin frowned. Surely Beast Boy could not be implying that Raven would be tricked again. They all knew her better than to think such a thing of her.

"I am sure that our friend will not fall for his trickery twice," Starfire gently commented, following Robin's line of thought.

"No, she won't," Robin affirmed with a confident shake of his head as he joined the other three. "And she was the only one who could stop him. If the Herald's interdimensional tactic didn't work, then it's up to Raven to stop Malchior once and for all. And we can't all go. We're needed here."

He knew they would assume he was referring only to the crime spike with his last sentence, and he didn't want to clarify that he was referring to Slade's possible involvement. That theory would remain unspoken until Robin could undoubtedly confirm his suspicions.

"I didn't mean to say she'd fall for it again," Beast Boy said, blushing and self-consciously rubbing the back of his neck. "I just meant that she might not be happy about seeing him."

"C'mon, what're you so worried about?" Cyborg blithely asked, elbowing Beast Boy in the side. "You know Raven can handle herself. So what if the giant lizard tricked her once? She beat him, and she's about to do it _twice_." He held up two fingers in Beast Boy's face for emphasis and beamed a smile.

"Yes!" Starfire eagerly agreed, pumping her fist in the air. "Our Raven will unleash the kicking of the butt and will defeat the Malchior once and for all!"

The three began what could only be described as a prediction and early celebration of Raven's victory, and Robin's mind tuned them out as it wandered.

_History might not always repeat itself, but the past does have a way of coming back_, he thought, alternately considering Raven's personal vendetta and his own.

Hopefully this would be the last time for both of them, and the past would finally _stay_ as history.

Why _was_ Malchior making a reappearance anyway, and in Steel City, no less? It didn't make sense. If the dragon had finally managed to obtain his full freedom, then why would he risk showing up in a city with a base of heroes stationed there? He had to be after something, something that he believed was located somewhere in that particular city. What more a dragon could possibly want past the next meal, Robin wouldn't even attempt to guess, but that was also why this wasn't his mission. Robin could deal with alien foes, mutated monsters, villains with too much time on their hands, and infamous masterminds, but he knew nothing about fantastical creatures or anything magic. The problem of Malchior was fully in Raven's hands, and Robin had full confidence that those were good hands to leave it in. He needn't worry any more about it.

With that dismissal, Robin's thoughts invariably turned back to the matter of Slade. There had to be something in the recent string of crimes that would point to him, and Robin was determined to find it. Slade had escaped for the last time when he had escaped death, and as far as Robin was concerned, the villain should have learned something and high-tailed it to the other side of the world. Not that geography would stop Robin, but it might have given Slade a chance.

* * *

AN: Foreshadowing and red herrings ftw! : ) Oh yes, I am sure that the chapter has mislead you all from where this is going. : ) And I know what some of you are thinking, "Oh that's cheating to move Mas and Menos elsewhere just because you can't speak the language!" Well, I figured it would be more forgiveable for me to give those two characters somewhere else to be than to massacre the Spanish language any further. : ) Same with Starfire, too. Trying to copy her speech pattern just about drove me crazy.

Anyways, I really would like to finish this story since I've already put so much work into it. I mean, I've already got most of the plot line, subplots, and sketches of several scenes written out, so it would be a shame for all of that to go to waste. As I said before, however, life is just being rather unkind at the moment, so I don't know what's going to happen. At the very least, I have even less time on my hands now, so I'm not going to be able to do all the additional research etc. to try to make the characters as little OOC as possible. Sorry!

Just in case, maybe you guys would like to help me out a little with some character profiles? There isn't much exposure to the Titans East, so I'm trying to get a good grasp on their personalities. This is all I have so far (I know it's not much, but I've been busy), so if you'd like to correct and/or add characteristics that I've missed, please do so.

Bumblebee:  
• softer accent than Cyborg's, mostly coming out when she's angry or excited  
• not as strict as Robin, but she can come across kind of bossy  
• kind and friendly, always ready to help  
• definitely concerned about looking out for other people  
• generally optimistic  
• willing to do what it takes to get something done

Aqualad:  
• has a sense of maturity, but he can also be brought down to the lowest common denominator, so to speak (i.e. Speedy's level) ; )  
• ready and willing to work  
• good team player, doesn't mind working with others or being told what to do  
• more interested in getting things done than in competition, but he _can_ be competitive if led to it  
• kind and friendly  
• can be obstinate

Speedy:  
• generally pessimistic, though perhaps not quite cynical  
• obviously has an attitude and tends to be cocky, prideful, and narcissistic  
• sarcastic  
• can be serious according to the situation  
• prefers to do what he wants, but is willing to work with the team (if reluctantly, at times)  
• Okay, I gather from additional research that he's a bit of a flirt and that he has a past history with drugs (should I include this in his character?)


End file.
